Step within

It’s time to knuckle down, time to get dirty. 

My dealing with deeply core issues has been coming for YEARS. Really core stuff. I can't meditate this away. There is more breaking down of ego that needs to be done. More leaning in to the fire to burn away these impurities, these old patterns - some of which aren't even mine.

For these roles I play - father, husband, brother, son, landscaper, transformational coach  - I cannot disappear for 10 years to sit at the feet of my teachers. Well... I could, but... You know.

So the meeting face to face of what I fear most is here again. Usually I recoil in horror at the power and immensity of it - just run, and work and deny it all.

Yet here it is again. Ready. Willing. Waiting. Deepset eyes watching me from the cave I dare not enter. It absolute horrifies me.